thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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