I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
