So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
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