I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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