no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
This is my gift to your gina
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
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