I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
