So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
fuck your aforementioned shoe
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize