Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
