a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
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