i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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