if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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