This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
two words: eviction party
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
