hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
i think i just naturally attract stoners
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
