new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
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