In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Randomize
