So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
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