Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
whose parrot is this?
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
