3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
last night I used snow as a chaser
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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