You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize
