I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
