from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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