is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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