Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
