Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
