There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
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