My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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