Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
