At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Randomize
