Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
