that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Randomize