What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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