Non-Jews are for practice
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
