After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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