Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Randomize
