i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
