Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
