you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
