I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
