so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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