Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize