I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
