I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Randomize
