I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
