What a fucking waste of an outfit
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
