How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
