Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Randomize