Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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