i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize