i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize