I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
