Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
