is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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